The dialect of desperation

Really scared now; that shiver of fear. I look at Linda , so hunched in  pain eyes so sunken, tissue constantly to her mouth to absorb the saliva that torments her day and night , symptoms throbbing.  Not knowing what she can eat anymore.

 I knocked out some sort of response to NICE before the 5pm deadline yesterday, but it bears no  relationship to how I feel about their atrocious conclusion that they see  no reason to change the Guideline and I am annoyed with myself.

 I am too stressed, too concerned with how to cope though  , to have written much more. Yes, I could have done a lot  better, but it's better to speak up than not, I believe,  and yesterday  was all I could manage.

That's all anyone can do.

We prayed Saturday night that Malcolm Hooper's formal complaint will be successful; it is the kind of  prayer that  I think Tommy Tenney calls the “dialect of desperation” (pg. 22, Prayers of God Chasers).

He writes , “I know it wasn’t my polished prayers as a professional preacher or pastor that brought me to an encounter with God years ago.....He met me in the midst of my inarticulate and passionate pleas of desperation and tears of frustration” (pg. 23, PGC).

With  NICE  declaring   the miserable failed  FINE trial results  "inconclusive" , we are overwhelmed with turpitude. I am glad I  made a stand yesterday. I am full of hope that Hooper WILL be heard; it was a powerful prayer.

When you are in this place, hope is the only thing  .You simply  have to cling on.


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