It just would not be so...

My life

Is a living torment
I wish it were not so
I wish I could say
That everything I had tried to do to get well had helped me
But it would not be true
I wish I could say
That every one who tried to help me had done so
But it would not be true
I wish I could say that everyone I trusted had been worthy of it
But it would not be so
I wish I could say I had not been betrayed
But it would not be so
I wish I could say I had not been let down
But it would not be so
I wish I could say I had not been mistreated
But it would not be so
I wish I could say I had not been misrepresented
But it would not be so
I wish I could say I had not been ignored
But it would not be so
I wish I could say that I feel safe
But it would not be so 
I wish I could say that all the myriad things we have done to raise genuine awareness of ME had been effective
But it would not be so
I wish I could say that there is a safe medical pathway for my illness
But it would not be so
I wish, how I wish, that I could say that people understand the difference between ME and CFS
But it would not be so.
I wish I could say there is reliable diagnosis
But it would not be so
And I really wishI could say that there is a cohesive representation of my illness 
But it just would no longer be so
I wish I could say with certainty that everyone with a diagnosis of ME actually has it
But the truth is that it is so misdiagnosed, misrepresented, misunderstood
That it horrifyingly, sadly, unacceptably would just not be so.
I wish I could say that I had been adequately investigated
But it would still, twenty years on, not be so
I wish I could say I have adequate medical support
But it would not be so
I wish I could say that research purporting to be fir ME is definitely looking at my illness
But it just would not be so
I wish I could say there is hope for the future
But it just would not be so
I wish I could say I have confidence in the charities supposed to be representing ME
But it just would not be so
I wish I could say the government is doing all it can to ensure accurate diagnosis and to provide a biomedical treatment pathway for ME
But it just would not be so
I wish I could say that the most severely ill people with ME are treated with medical respect and are at the forefront of medical research
But it just is not so.

Shocking isn't it?
Or is it?


 

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