A Challenge To Grow

For any relationship there is is inevitably, over time, a challenge to grow, to deal with change, to face adversity together. When very severe chronic illness invades your world, however, it brings a profound encounter with your own limits, paradox and mystery, for you are daily confronted on multiple levels with loss and grief alongside a need to rise above it all and find your true self, even in the darkest chasms of pain.

The immense physical, emotional and spiritual stresses and strains of a situation where the other is long-term ill and disabled, can bring encounter with loss, grief, anger, despair, a sense of hopelessness and helplessness.

The challenge is to look beyond the situation and try to see new possibilities, anything that might help, that can be done differently or even learning to live with and accept things as they are.
Often I have had to dig very deep, to find some chink of hope, in the darkest, most hopeless times. Entering into this journey with compassion for both of you and an intention to live as fully as possible within the context and limits placed upon you both, by the illness, is critical, in my experience. The robin, for example, in the poster below, photographed hanging out with us, has become a most welcome friend , companion and comfort.

Be kind and generous to yourself. Aim to acknowledge what is brave, good, noble, amazing about you.

(Adapted from "More Notes For Carers" https://stonebird.co.uk/morenotes/index.html)


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